Are You Compatible?
Date posted: 06/06/16
Compatibility in and out of the bedroom can be the difference between ok sex and incredible sex. If you don’t have some degree of chemistry and enjoyment of each other’s company, encounters can be awkward or just lack that special something that really makes them memorable.
So what should you look for?
Does conversation flow?
Have you ever had a date where you’re both just desperately shuffling through small talk hoping to strike conversational gold? Looking for those common interests to spark deeper conversation can be painful, especially if it just never happens. If you spend time with a person you immediately hit it off with, you can consider that to be a great indicator of your compatibility – and it will hopefully result in similar sparks flying in the bedroom.
Do you have any mutual interests?
Knowing about mutual interests before you meet up can help you prepare and avoid some of that awkward chitchat altogether. While you don’t want the person you’re spending time with to be a carbon copy of yourself, having some common ground is a great way to judge whether you’ll click (on more levels than one!).
Do you have similar sex drives?
Vastly different sex drives have been the downfall of many relationships. Often, people who are extremely compatible in other areas will try and fool themselves into thinking it’s not that important, until eventually it drives a wedge between even the most well-matched duo. Don’t take the first few encounters as a given, because many people find their libido decreasing once they are securely in a relationship or are used to the person. Your best bet is to just ask them what their sex drive is typically like – if you want it every day but they’re more a ‘once-a-month’ kinda person, you may run into trouble down the track.
Do you like the same things in the bedroom?
Finding out months in that, for example, one person really loves feet, but you’re really grossed out by them could indicate incompatibility when it comes to sex. Of course, compromise is always possible, but being unfulfilled sexually can again cause trouble over time. Try and find someone who has a good overlap with your desires, and who has an open mind when it comes to trying new things.
Do you both want the same thing?
Are they looking for a serious long-term relationship while you’re looking for a casual relationship? Do you want to enjoy a night of passion and then… well… never speak to them again, while they are busy planning your future children’s names? Sorry, buddy – red flags are flying here. If you know what they want, and are sure you don’t want the same, continuing down that path will only end in drama. Get on the same page early, and you can both get more out of your time together.
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